Yesterday I was working with a friend of mine. She's a very nice, fun sweet girl. She's a lot of fun and often has a smile on her face. Yesterday her eyes were dark with sadness. She had her arms over her stomach like she had a stomach virus perhaps. She looked ill. I asked her what was going on--if she was okay. She really looked terrible. She told me she was not alright. I asked her what was wrong. She hesitated...
Then she said "My boyfriend broke up with me".
I told her I was sorry. That's all I could think to say. I didn't have a chance to speak with her after that because we were busy. But every once in I while I happened to glance her way and see the pain in her eyes.
I realized that in all my life I had never seen anyone affected quite that deeply by a break-up. I'm not sure why... I've had close friends who've broken up before. Either they were ready for it, or they just weren't around me when they were hurting... or they hid it well.
That's not relevant. What I'm curious is how one should respond in a situation like this. Was my response appropriate? I mean, I didn't really have a chance to say more anyway... but what if it happens to someone I'm closer to? It broke my heart to see her that way... and she's a person I see only at work. I mean, she's a great person, but our friendship really isn't that intimate. I mean, How close can you be with someone you see only at work? ...because that's how close we are.
My heart aches for her right now. I don't know when I'll see her again, but I hope she has a smile on her face.
Anyway... what I'm most looking for is this:
How would you respond? I'm curious.
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2 comments:
Greg, there is no easy answer for something like this. What I always do is ask the Lord to give me words to say. Sometimes the appropriate response is to simply let them know how sorry you are like you did.
I would hug her. But that might make things worse. Girls are emotional that way, and that may very easily open the floodgates.
I think you responded in the best way you could. You are sorry, and you can't really take the pain away.
You could try to make her smile, maybe. You're good at that. Draw her a picture :)
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